How advisors can keep heirs from leaving

A 2025 Harris poll found 42% of heirs planned to stay with their parents’ advisors, 43% planned to leave and 16% were unsure. The split suggests many advisors could lose next‑generation clients if heirs are not included in planning conversations.

The poll listed reasons heirs planned to leave: 38% pointed to a difference in investment philosophy, 33% cited misaligned values, 26% said they did not personally know the advisor and 26% said they did not trust the advisor. Among heirs who planned to stay, 53% credited strong communication from advisors.

Linda Eaton, executive vice president at Cannon Financial Institute in Georgia, recommends avoiding surprises when inviting heirs into discussions. Eaton suggests framing the idea as a question rather than announcing a family meeting, and avoiding scripted lines. She proposes using a hypothetical scenario-such as an heir suddenly receiving money they are not prepared to manage-to help parents picture outcomes and express preferences. Eaton uses the phrase, “Never tell when you can ask,” to underline the value of inviting parents to imagine situations before answering.

Timing around dollar amounts is a frequent concern. Many parents do not want heirs to know exact inheritance figures. Eaton recommends beginning with principle- and values-based conversations before revealing numbers. Topics to introduce early include what parents want their children to know, which skills or responsibilities parents expect heirs to have, and what outcomes parents hope for.

Emily Boothroyd, a wealth manager at Merit Financial Advisors in Connecticut, builds a planning agenda from parents’ responses. She asks what clients want to do for their children and for the broader world and what worries them about their money. That wish list becomes the agenda for family meetings; Boothroyd sends the agenda to family members and follows up individually. Eaton notes that sharing an agenda can help establish the advisor’s role with the family.

Advisors are advised to avoid making initial family meetings feel clinical. Boothroyd warns that blunt, formal questions such as “what are your estate planning concerns” can catch parents off guard and limit conversation. Laura Bereiter of White Oaks Wealth Management in Minneapolis recommends meeting heirs in person when feasible to demonstrate expertise and the level of care the advisor provides.

Practices advisors use to engage heirs include asking open-ended questions, avoiding scripts, framing hypothetical scenarios, focusing on values and goals before numbers, preparing a clear agenda for family members and following up one-on-one. These actions aim to build familiarity and trust between heirs and the advisor and to address both financial and emotional aspects of wealth transfer.